Saturday, December 12, 2009
So today, encouraged by yesterday's success, and knowing that in the evening we'll have to clean the studio for a shoot tomorrow, we decided to go to the 3rd Ward craft fair, which was stepping up on yesterday's outing, because it was sort of out of our way - we actually had to leave the safty of walkable distances and take the train to get there.
Actually it turned out to be very near a restaurant we have walked ot in the past, though not in this weather, so we took the train.
I've only been to 3rd ward once before, it was for some artsy party that was both very loud and cramped with people and totally not interesting. I had a sort of bad memory from that night and so was a bit apprehensive about going there again.
The event itself was actually very nice (though just as crowded) with many vendors and a lot of buyers (which made me a little sorry for not knowing about this and getting a booth myself).
We walked around, brought Ned a really beautiful cup from a beautiful artist, and a small potted plant. It was fun. And I did feel less awkward, though still very awkward. I manage to introduce myself to a few of the vendors (it's very odd to say "hi, we are photographers") and pass 5 business cards to different jewelery designers who I thought might lend us some pieces for fashion shoots. After a couple, Ned took my lead and passed our cards to 2-3 more vendors.
We spend about 50 minutes there, in whole at the end meeting a guy we know from one of the restaurants we go to, and talked a bit about the diffrent vendors and what we are all up to for the day.
There is a whole dark side to this.
Though writing what I wrote, I do feel accomplished and like i did what I wanted. I'm also very anxious about it. I feel like it's all a big waste of time, like it sucks that I practically have to beg, well, maybe not beg but initiated an interaction in order to be allowed to do someone a big favor (taking photos of their jewelery for free) - I resent them for not writing already, though we did hear from the nice girl who made Ned's new cup.
Also, I came across a fashion designer I knew who was one of the vendors, Ned and I shot some of her dresses a couple of years back, somehow, I couldn't bring myself ot say hello or even acknowledge the fact that I knew here.
Third - I somehow feel resentful toward Ned for buying that cup. It's a stupid thing, I know, but I felt it was too expensive and I keep making the math of how much etsy stuff I have to sell to make up for it. We that I suddenly get stressed about money in general, and how much we spend on food today and coffee and pizza after the craft fair.
There's really no reason for it, I guess I'm just anxious about taking a chance today and things maybe changing in my life as a result.
Still I am really happy that we went even though I'm feeling anxious about it now.