Ned's father is going to the hospital tomorrow, he's going to have a bone marrow transplant, which means he's going to be in a clean room on his own for 3 weeks and not allowed to go out of it, we can visit if we scrub and wear doctor's masks. He's probably going to be really tired and weak, but hopefully, after this, will start to recover from cancer.
We've been at home mostly, not quite feel like doing anything, both edgy and upset, we had 2 fights in the past couple of days, we usually don't fight. I really hate fighting with Ned. It always reminds me how alike we are though, we say the same things to one another in this strange spiral conversation that only ends when one of us decide it's enough and that there aren't going to be any winners in this.
My father called yesterday, waking me up at 2:00 PM after a long night of working. He told me that the dog that they took from the pound a while ago isn't working out for them, she keep crying and wants to go out for walks all the time, he said that they are going to give it back to the pound. It made me really sad, how bad they are with pets and the idea that you can take and give away a responsibility for another living soul.
In the bathroom, while brushing out teeth later that afternoon, Ned said "this is your home, even if we fight I love you and I'm not sending you back to the pound".
I didn't really feel like making anything or answering any e-mails or talking much. Also, a very slow past 10 days on Etsy really didn't make me feel like listing or making anything new.
I did however started and finished our new website and also worked on a new project that involves a massive amount of photos from our trip to PA a couple of weeks back. I sort of feel like packing a bag and going of a long trip, I think mostly because I don't want to be hear and deal with how I'm feeling.
2 comments:
that's a lot of stress that you guys are under, i can imagine there is a lot of fear and anxiety about the unknown future. It's understandable that it would cause more fights to happen than usual. I think what Ned said is the sweetest most beautiful thing ever.
Take care thru these tough times.
It is so difficult to deal with cancer and all the sideshows that go along with it (such as the chemo, the radiation, the transplants, the endless hospital and doctor visit and tests etc...). It's all so labor and soul intensive! Hang in there.
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